Oh, when Millie died it was worse than when humans in my life died. I know that's not a popular thing to say, but nothing compares to the pure loyalty and love of a dog. If you aren't a dog person, this is hard to explain. But if you are a dog person it needs no explanation at all.

I'm sorry about Mollie and Sparky. I don't think your post is rambling and I think I know exactly what you are trying to say. Fish slept over at his dog sitter's last night (it was a test run) and the house felt so, so empty.

While, my impulse is to get another dog right away after a loss, I also understand not being able to. The grief is just too much.