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Adeline Dimond
Adeline Dimond

11K Followers

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Published in

Sybarite

·Pinned

How to Make Out in a Camaro

I walked so you could run. — If you are an American, someday you will go on a date and be asked to make out in a Camaro. You must say yes, because it’s the the law and you love your country. It’s like the draft, but for everybody. No one knows when that day will come…

Lifestyle

9 min read

How to Make Out in a Camaro
How to Make Out in a Camaro
Lifestyle

9 min read


Pinned

Notes on Our Collective Mental Breakdown

We need help. — I don’t think it’s up for debate that we are in the midst of a collective mental breakdown. If there were any lingering doubt, the photos of Will Smith dancing at Oscar parties after he assaulted Chris Rock has removed it. Did Will’s publicist just walk off the job? Probably…

Psychology

6 min read

Notes on Our Collective Mental Breakdown
Notes on Our Collective Mental Breakdown
Psychology

6 min read


Published in

Human Parts

·Pinned

A List of Mistakes, in No Particular Order

There are a lot — It was a mistake to sell my apartment in Brooklyn. It was a mistake to come back to Los Angeles for a boy. It was a mistake not to swim through a magical underwater tunnel in Kauai, that led to a cylinder-like rock formation with a ceiling to the sky…

Psychology

5 min read

A List of Mistakes, in No Particular Order
A List of Mistakes, in No Particular Order
Psychology

5 min read


Published in

Human Parts

·Pinned

How to Become a Bed Creature™

This is the life hacks of all life hacks — I hate it when people give unsolicited advice. For instance, yesterday an old friend walked into my house for the first time, and told me to get rid of all my books because they made the place looked cluttered. “You really like books, huh?” she said, staring at a small…

Self

7 min read

How to Become a Bed Creature™
How to Become a Bed Creature™
Self

7 min read


Published in

Human Parts

·Pinned

Schrödinger’s Loneliness

I’m lonely but I’m also not — Wikipedia explains that Schrödinger’s Cat “is a thought experiment that illustrates a paradox of quantum superposition. In the thought experiment, a hypothetical cat may be considered simultaneously both alive and dead as a result of its fate being linked to a random subatomic event that may or may not occur.”…

Psychology

7 min read

Schrödinger’s Loneliness
Schrödinger’s Loneliness
Psychology

7 min read


Published in

Sybarite

·Aug 27

The Sybarite Newsletter: Back from the Dead

Reporting to you with puffy eyes and smoke-filled lungs. — Greetings from the primordial slime of grief and confusion. Dad died on July 31 and the funeral was on August 13. Between those two dates, I spent all my time planning the funeral and doing other stupid shit. I was definitely not writing or editing or publishing. After the funeral…

Newsletter

5 min read

The Sybarite Newsletter: Back from the Dead
The Sybarite Newsletter: Back from the Dead
Newsletter

5 min read


Published in

Sybarite

·Aug 1

The Sybarite Newsletter: Pause

I’m gonna need a minute. — My dad died. Someday I’ll write about it, the absurdity of death in our modern world, with tubes and drips and machines that we can turn on and off at will, as if we have all morphed into video game characters. Someday I’ll write about how nurses are the best…

Newsletter

2 min read

The Sybarite Newsletter: Pause
The Sybarite Newsletter: Pause
Newsletter

2 min read


Published in

Sybarite

·Jul 24

The Sybarite Newsletter: Still Alive, Kinda

Back in the saddle but smoking a lot of cigarettes. Also: sandwiches. — Greetings from my bed — otherwise known as Sybarite HQ. It’s been a long time since I’ve written a newsletter, because life got really messy. Again. My father’s assisted living facility was bought by another company, and apparently they don’t give the level of care he needs, even though the…

Food

5 min read

The Sybarite Newsletter: Still Alive, Kinda
The Sybarite Newsletter: Still Alive, Kinda
Food

5 min read


Jul 8

Snark at the Supreme Court

Unpacking 303 Creative v. Elenis, in which the justices get into a rhetorical cage match. — Full disclosure: I read 303 Creative v. Elenis because I was going to write a screed about how the media has gotten this case all wrong. A few days ago NPR introduced a story about the case by saying “The Supreme Court made it lawful to discriminate against LGBTQ+ people.”…

Law

11 min read

Snark at the Supreme Court
Snark at the Supreme Court
Law

11 min read


Published in

Human Parts

·Jul 1

All Hail Carmelita Whipsnade

She is our only weapon against chaos. — When I took over my parents’ lives, I had to answer every phone call, even if they were from unfamiliar numbers. I’m too tired to explain why. I’ll just assume that everyone understands how calls from banks, doctors, caretakers, pharmacies, and asshole credit card companies work, namely, that their numbers…

Technology

6 min read

All Hail Carmelita Whipsnade
All Hail Carmelita Whipsnade
Technology

6 min read

Adeline Dimond

Adeline Dimond

11K Followers

Federal attorney, writing thought crimes on Medium. To connect: Adeline.Dimond@gmail.com

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